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Talk:Doctor Who Adventures/The Cylocks
Review -- Segment 1: The Cylocks Before Time: The first segment introduced a brilliant idea, what if something existed that came from before our universe. The time missiles are also a fantastic idea which I hope will be used in future stories. The story was quite fast paced and I felt the Doctor overreacted to everything. Slow down your stories and get your ideas better represented onto the page. Turtlecake365 (talk) 16:58, August 1, 2015 (UTC) This story is like.....Good and bad. It's both good and bad, if that's possible. Bad because...well...The Doctor overreacted(like Turtle said), and it was rushed. But I;m not gonna fault you too much for that, cause my stories were just like that when I was new :P The good parts come from the whole wibbly wobley timey wimey situation. I liked the idea of them being saved by someone they saved, but whom they haven't yet saved. MasterCharmander 13 08:16, August 8, 2015 (UTC) Segment 2: Shouldn't Be Here: Segment two was a whole load of rushed situation with the distress call being a fantastic idea but I felt the Cylocks were defeated far too quickly and the Doctor seems to continue to overreact. The good part in this segment was the continuing theme of how did the Cylocks get back in this universe and I felt the explanation was very well thought out and made a lot of sense. --Turtlecake365 (talk) 12:21, August 10, 2015 (UTC) Segment 3: This Is Not The Army: The third segment gave a very good idea with the Cylocks attacking at multiple locations which is a fantastic idea which I felt could have been explored in a greater depth. There were some funny moments like the army moment and the brakes mention from Handles. This part did not seem as rushed as the other did and it seems that the story is improving. --Turtlecake365 (talk) 12:37, August 10, 2015 (UTC) Segment 4/Overall Review: No Swords and Not In The Army: Segment 4 showed the Cylocks having great power with them deadlocking the universe crossings. I felt like this idea was not explored into enough depth for their to be considered a serious threat. There were many brilliant ideas like the universe breaching, the Time Cylock. These ideas were not given enough time to develop and I felt the ending with the sonic screwdriver was a huge deux ex machina with little logic behind it. Also the Time Cylock was defeated far too easily at the end. I felt like you could have made the story twice as long which would have made it a lot better than the finished outcome. I am also shocked that the Doctor would allow the Cylocks invade the other universes as he only closed the breach and did not stop the Cylock invasions in other universes. It was a good first story for a Doctor Who series and I can see you have a lot of potential. Just make your stories longer and don't lumber on ideas at the very end of the story. --Turtlecake365 (talk) 12:48, August 10, 2015 (UTC) It is a great idea with the Cylocks and the time missiles. I agree with the others, it comes across rushed and it doesn't really expand on the forementioned ideas and other ones. It was a good attempt at a first story. It's hard to get a feel for the show and the wiki when you start out. Hey, just check out my first story for DWA :p --Eighth doctor 14 (talk) 16:20, February 20, 2016 (UTC)